[She's apologizing, and that should make him feel better, but... It doesn't. It just makes him feel worse, because she couldn't know how bad that fuck lightning thing was without living through it. And she should be upset if the mistaken take-away is that Marc cheated on her. She was right to be angry, but boy did it sting.
His hands squeeze into one another, and his right thumb rubs along his left index finger. This is another tricky question, but he'd already warned Cobb he would tell Layla everything, so... No holding back.]
Yeah, he knows. I told him. But not till after it already happened, 'cause it never came up before then. [...] It was Cobb.
[That shouldn't surprise her, but he does. She never thought of Marc as bisexual, but if he is that makes no difference to her. Maybe it was the fuck lightning that made it like that, but either way, it doesn't make a difference. Male or female or nonbinary, it's still someone outside their marriage and it still stings harshly.
Especially since she enjoyed the man's company just the other night.]
I met him the other night.. seemed nice. Not surprised he helped you..
[Her tone is a little flat, a lot hurt. It puts a face on it, but it doesn't give her anything to be upset at, with. It would be a lie to say she was anything but distraught right now. She's still so mad, so upset, but Marc doesn't deserve that anger and she has nothing to take it out on.
It makes her want to run away, just like when she was mad about her dad's murder and had nothing and no one to take it out on so she ran from Cairo. Ran until she found Marc's arms... but now she can't even run into those.]
[Marc didn't think of Marc as bisexual. Even now, after all that, he still doesn't. In the heat of the moment, Cobb looked attractive and desirable and all those things that could get a person riled up. Afterwards, he looked... Well, still attractive in the universal sense, but not attractive to Marc. Other people would be lucky to have him.
He draws in a deep breath, then finally looks up at her again.]
Let it sink in, I guess...? I dunno what else there is to do.
[Because he doesn't expect her to act as if this never happened. Even though the choice was taken away from him, that's not how this works.]
[She guesses that's about all she can do. Let it sink in, try to find an outlet for her emotions. Because she wants to be mad at Marc but can't be. He's not at fault here, not really. There wasn't much to say at this point. What more was there to say?
Still hiding her face in her hands, she takes a shuddery breath as she just finds herself tearing up again. Finds herself on the verge of crying once more. This pain and anger was excruciating and she had nowhere to outlet it. She's mad at the fox but that's like when she was mad at God for taking away her father, it felt useless. She felt useless.]
Yeah.. I think, I'll take a shower and go to bed. [A pause.] I do.. appreciate you being honest with me. [It would have ruined their marriage completely for her to learn it any other way.]
I don't hate you or want a divorce, but I need time.. and space.
[Marc nods his head vaguely. It's not like Layla hadn't already been taking time to process all the other shit that he's dumped on her recently. Now it's just going to take even longer, he supposes. Or maybe she'll never work through it. Hell if he knows. This is why he thinks she could do better- because all he does is make her miserable, whether it's through conscious decisions or just really rotten luck.]
Yeah, okay. Sure. [A pause, and then:] For what it's worth, I did mean it. About wantin' to do it right this time. And this was the last of the... the shitty surprises.
Oh thank god. [She can't stop the watery, sad, but relieved laugh that leaves her when he says it's the last of the shitty surprises, because their marriage might not survive any more shitty surprises honestly. They need to work through the bumps they already have. She needs to take the advice of that one person, have them work on their troubles together so the trials don't tear them apart.
But they will get through this, even if by her stubborn desire to stay with Marc. Because she doesn't love easily or lightly and she loves this complicated, difficult man with all her heart.]
And I know, I do. I meant it too, us working through all of this, trying again.. not giving up. [Even if part of her wants to hide and deal with these painful emotions like a wild animal licking their wounds. She just needs time.]
[In all honesty, it took Marc a little while to run everything through his head and be sure this was everything. But he told her everything about Bushman, about her father's death, about Randall, about the reason he went to Chicago shortly before sending those divorce papers... Yeah. That was everything. If there's even more, it's not coming to him.
He's still amazed she hasn't given up on him. Grateful, but amazed. He's used to being abandoned for far less.]
Okay... Thanks. [.....] I'll do the dishes. Make sure everything's cleaned up before Steven gets home.
[She nods, moving to stand and moves towards the bathroom, though she stops, lingering at the door for a second. There is so much she could say, so much she doesn't know how to put into words, so much that are just wordless, but she knows she doesn't want to walk away without acknowledging her own fault in what she's done.
It's obviously something that bothered him enough to bring it up and even though he's not apologized to her really for all this, she isn't gonna let that stop her. Apologizing his hard for her, but she lingers against the jamb for a moment, before sighing heavily.]
Sorry.. for kissing Steven. [There. She won't give excuses or reasons, just apologize for her part in what happened.]
[He was already getting up himself, more than ready to start gathering up plates and glasses, and anything else that needs washing. It'll keep him busy, keep his mind focused on something else. Hopefully. But he wasn't expecting her to pause by the doorway, so he stops in his own tracks and looks her way before she even speaks.
... Fuck. He made such a mistake, blurting that out. He shouldn't have said anything about it. Fuck-]
No. Don't...- It's okay. I shouldn't have... thrown that back in your face. Sorry.
[The sentiment itself still stands, though. Even with the divorce, even with the fact that Steven is technically part of him, it bugs him. And maybe if they'd still been home, as they're meant to be, it would've been easier to work through all this. Not now, though. Not when Steven has his own body and the chance to live a life that's more separate from Marc.]
No, you shouldn't have but.. [She shakes her head with a shrug, something as if to say 'what's done is done.' Still she just gives a sigh and looks at him for a long moment, eyes teary, face lined with grief and other emotions.
Again, her mind is a whirl of things to say, things without words, things she doesn't want to say. But instead she lets the silence hang as she steps into the bathroom and shuts the door to take a very long shower. If he comes close enough to the door, he might hear her crying as she sits on the floor of the shower and just sobs to try and rid herself of all these emotions that have no outlet, that just sit heavy in her chest and make it hard to breathe.
When the water starts to run cold, she will finally leave the shower and just go straight to her room, Marc's room, and go to bed. Though sleep won't find her for a long time.]
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His hands squeeze into one another, and his right thumb rubs along his left index finger. This is another tricky question, but he'd already warned Cobb he would tell Layla everything, so... No holding back.]
Yeah, he knows. I told him. But not till after it already happened, 'cause it never came up before then. [...] It was Cobb.
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Especially since she enjoyed the man's company just the other night.]
I met him the other night.. seemed nice. Not surprised he helped you..
[Her tone is a little flat, a lot hurt. It puts a face on it, but it doesn't give her anything to be upset at, with. It would be a lie to say she was anything but distraught right now. She's still so mad, so upset, but Marc doesn't deserve that anger and she has nothing to take it out on.
It makes her want to run away, just like when she was mad about her dad's murder and had nothing and no one to take it out on so she ran from Cairo. Ran until she found Marc's arms... but now she can't even run into those.]
I don't know what to do.
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He draws in a deep breath, then finally looks up at her again.]
Let it sink in, I guess...? I dunno what else there is to do.
[Because he doesn't expect her to act as if this never happened. Even though the choice was taken away from him, that's not how this works.]
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Still hiding her face in her hands, she takes a shuddery breath as she just finds herself tearing up again. Finds herself on the verge of crying once more. This pain and anger was excruciating and she had nowhere to outlet it. She's mad at the fox but that's like when she was mad at God for taking away her father, it felt useless. She felt useless.]
Yeah.. I think, I'll take a shower and go to bed. [A pause.] I do.. appreciate you being honest with me. [It would have ruined their marriage completely for her to learn it any other way.]
I don't hate you or want a divorce, but I need time.. and space.
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Yeah, okay. Sure. [A pause, and then:] For what it's worth, I did mean it. About wantin' to do it right this time. And this was the last of the... the shitty surprises.
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But they will get through this, even if by her stubborn desire to stay with Marc. Because she doesn't love easily or lightly and she loves this complicated, difficult man with all her heart.]
And I know, I do. I meant it too, us working through all of this, trying again.. not giving up. [Even if part of her wants to hide and deal with these painful emotions like a wild animal licking their wounds. She just needs time.]
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He's still amazed she hasn't given up on him. Grateful, but amazed. He's used to being abandoned for far less.]
Okay... Thanks. [.....] I'll do the dishes. Make sure everything's cleaned up before Steven gets home.
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It's obviously something that bothered him enough to bring it up and even though he's not apologized to her really for all this, she isn't gonna let that stop her. Apologizing his hard for her, but she lingers against the jamb for a moment, before sighing heavily.]
Sorry.. for kissing Steven. [There. She won't give excuses or reasons, just apologize for her part in what happened.]
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... Fuck. He made such a mistake, blurting that out. He shouldn't have said anything about it. Fuck-]
No. Don't...- It's okay. I shouldn't have... thrown that back in your face. Sorry.
[The sentiment itself still stands, though. Even with the divorce, even with the fact that Steven is technically part of him, it bugs him. And maybe if they'd still been home, as they're meant to be, it would've been easier to work through all this. Not now, though. Not when Steven has his own body and the chance to live a life that's more separate from Marc.]
no subject
Again, her mind is a whirl of things to say, things without words, things she doesn't want to say. But instead she lets the silence hang as she steps into the bathroom and shuts the door to take a very long shower. If he comes close enough to the door, he might hear her crying as she sits on the floor of the shower and just sobs to try and rid herself of all these emotions that have no outlet, that just sit heavy in her chest and make it hard to breathe.
When the water starts to run cold, she will finally leave the shower and just go straight to her room, Marc's room, and go to bed. Though sleep won't find her for a long time.]